A friend and spiritual mentor encouraged me soon after Micah’s death that we need to be thankful in every circumstance. He encouraged us to find reason to be thankful to God as soon as possible. Ephesians 5:19&20 says, “Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” I found that encouragement very hard to swallow. It is one thing to give thanks when the sun is shining on your face, and “Mr. Bluebird is whistling on your shoulder.” How could we possibly give thanks for the circumstances surrounding Micah’s death?
In the contemporary version of the “Four Spiritual Laws” booklet produced by Campus Crusade for Christ, the booklet includes an illustration of a train pulling a caboose. The train is entitled “Fact,” and the caboose is entitled, “Feelings.” The booklet stresses the importance of the historical life, death and resurrection of Christ on the cross on our behalf, and to trust in that “fact,” regardless of how we “feel” about the circumstances of our lives. In other words, we must look to the scriptures for promises and to trust in those promises even when we don’t feel like God loves us. We must allow the facts of God’s promises to us in scripture to “pull us through” all of life’s circumstances when we have no reason to believe, based upon our circumstances alone, of God’s great promises for us in Christ Jesus.
Last year, on Thanksgiving Day, Heather agreed, on purpose, to work at the Hospital all day. I went to the cemetery and then posted some thoughts entitled, “Thankful for the Living Hope,” in which I expressed thankfulness for our future hope, through Jesus Christ, in the resurrection of our deceased son Micah. But with regard to our particular circumstances, I didn’t particularly feel much like celebrating. Our circumstances didn’t lend themselves to allowing the “caboose” of feelings pull our faith. Our long-awaited son had died that summer, and now we were left on our first holiday without him. God had seemingly answered our prayers for a child with Micah, and then, very suddenly, took him away under tragic circumstances.
On this Thanksgiving Day, I am amazed and thankful for what God has done since I wrote that post last year on Thanksgiving Day. We’ve gone through the myriad of emotions accompanying a sudden death—shock, avoidance, despair, depression, and anger. We have maintained a faith in the goodness of God by focusing on the “facts” of God’s sovereignty, His goodness, His mercy and His love.
This year, from an emotional perspective, we have seen a gradual turning (or returning) of joy in our life. Particularly in the birth of our second son, Owen, we have had occasion for our home to be full of laughter, smiles, and baby sounds once again. This Thanksgiving Day, we continue to be thankful for the same things we were thankful for last year, namely, the goodness and mercy of God demonstrated to us through Christ. But in addition to being grateful for these eternal promises, we are also thankful this year for our new son, Owen. We are thankful for how God has maintained and strengthened our marriage. We are thankful for a family who has supported us in our grieving. We are thankful for friends like you who have loved and supported us so well. On behalf of Heather, Owen and I, Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family, and may you be able to “give thanks in all circumstances,” whether those circumstances easily lend themselves to praising God, or because of your hope, that through Christ, we will someday be grateful for what God has done in and through more difficult circumstances.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Thanks Friends
In 2 Corinthians 1:3-5, Paul says, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.”
Over the past 15 months, Heather and I have experienced great sufferings. Our world has been turned upside down; there is no adequate description for the grief that accompanies the sudden death of your oldest son. In many ways, we’ve lost our lives. We have lost our hopes and dreams. While we have much joy in our second son, Owen, we have not “moved on” from the death of our oldest son, Micah. We have, and will always have, a hole in our family; that hole in our lives, that spot at the dinner table, that empty bedroom, will always be there, this side of Heaven. It will not be filled until the day when we see Micah again in Heaven. We will not be healed from our suffering until we see Jesus and Micah.
But just as we have experienced great suffering by reason of Micah’s death, we have also been greatly comforted by all of you. God has graciously provided the love and support of family members and friends, both old and new, who have been vessels of God’s comfort to us. We have received the comfort of God through you, friends and family. And for that, we are so grateful.
As many of you know, we decided to create the Micah Wessman Foundation to try to comfort those who are in the affliction of the death of a child. We are using the same ways in which God comforted us, through you, to attempt to comfort others. When we hear about the death of a child, we have been sending care packages to the parents. The care packages are currently comprised of two books on grieving, written from a Christian perspective, as well as gift cards to local restaurants. The care package also includes information on a scholarship offer we have with Smile Again Ministries in Brainerd. In the near future, we plan to add a third book as well as contact information for local Christian grief groups and counselors.
Heather and I have come to think that our efforts in creating this little ministry has become inseparable from the way that we grieve. In other words, we grieve our son's death through the actions we take in helping comfort others. We think that it is good for us to grieve in this way, and we thank you for your many financial gifts and the many other ways in which you have encouraged us to minister in this way.
We would ask that you help us in this ministry be making us aware of any families who have lost young children. By word of mouth alone, we have been put in touch with approximatley 14 families over the past year who have lost young children and experienced a stillborn death. It has been our priviledge to pass along care packages to these families. We have also provided 2 scholarships to Smile Again Ministries. This next year, our goal is to create a professional website to include some of the writings from my blog as well as numerous links and resources for grieving parents. Through the website and the traffic we hope to generate, we hope to significantly increase the number of care packages sent over the next year.
Thanks again for all of your support. We have shared abundantly in Christ's comfort through you, and for that we are so grateful.
Over the past 15 months, Heather and I have experienced great sufferings. Our world has been turned upside down; there is no adequate description for the grief that accompanies the sudden death of your oldest son. In many ways, we’ve lost our lives. We have lost our hopes and dreams. While we have much joy in our second son, Owen, we have not “moved on” from the death of our oldest son, Micah. We have, and will always have, a hole in our family; that hole in our lives, that spot at the dinner table, that empty bedroom, will always be there, this side of Heaven. It will not be filled until the day when we see Micah again in Heaven. We will not be healed from our suffering until we see Jesus and Micah.
But just as we have experienced great suffering by reason of Micah’s death, we have also been greatly comforted by all of you. God has graciously provided the love and support of family members and friends, both old and new, who have been vessels of God’s comfort to us. We have received the comfort of God through you, friends and family. And for that, we are so grateful.
As many of you know, we decided to create the Micah Wessman Foundation to try to comfort those who are in the affliction of the death of a child. We are using the same ways in which God comforted us, through you, to attempt to comfort others. When we hear about the death of a child, we have been sending care packages to the parents. The care packages are currently comprised of two books on grieving, written from a Christian perspective, as well as gift cards to local restaurants. The care package also includes information on a scholarship offer we have with Smile Again Ministries in Brainerd. In the near future, we plan to add a third book as well as contact information for local Christian grief groups and counselors.
Heather and I have come to think that our efforts in creating this little ministry has become inseparable from the way that we grieve. In other words, we grieve our son's death through the actions we take in helping comfort others. We think that it is good for us to grieve in this way, and we thank you for your many financial gifts and the many other ways in which you have encouraged us to minister in this way.
We would ask that you help us in this ministry be making us aware of any families who have lost young children. By word of mouth alone, we have been put in touch with approximatley 14 families over the past year who have lost young children and experienced a stillborn death. It has been our priviledge to pass along care packages to these families. We have also provided 2 scholarships to Smile Again Ministries. This next year, our goal is to create a professional website to include some of the writings from my blog as well as numerous links and resources for grieving parents. Through the website and the traffic we hope to generate, we hope to significantly increase the number of care packages sent over the next year.
Thanks again for all of your support. We have shared abundantly in Christ's comfort through you, and for that we are so grateful.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Second Birthday
We miss you, Micah, our first born son
Another year without you on your birthday
We wish that our life here, with you, had just begun
That God had not taken you away
How I would love to see
Your eyes turns bright and wide
As you open a gift from me
And to see you giggle at my side
How I would delight in you, my son
To see you smile, walk and then run
To hear your voice again, or just your cry
And together watch the years go by
But I am stuck here in this world
So far from Heaven, from God’s glory fully unfurled
Not able to see what awaits
Beyond our graves and Heaven’s pearly gates
Oh, how we wish we might
Be free from this sin and death
And in the land of unending delight
With you, my son, with life and breath
For while my gifts for you would one day break
I can only imagine what gifts you now receive
From God, who loves to give and make
Such wonderful gifts for you, we can hardly conceive
Gifts large and small, just for you
Through Jesus, who makes all things new
Even after everything that went wrong, when you fell
We know that Jesus has made you well.
So while we can’t sing you a birthday song
We hope and pray it won’t be long
‘Till we laugh and play and sing together
And marvel at God’s love and mercy forever
Another year without you on your birthday
We wish that our life here, with you, had just begun
That God had not taken you away
How I would love to see
Your eyes turns bright and wide
As you open a gift from me
And to see you giggle at my side
How I would delight in you, my son
To see you smile, walk and then run
To hear your voice again, or just your cry
And together watch the years go by
But I am stuck here in this world
So far from Heaven, from God’s glory fully unfurled
Not able to see what awaits
Beyond our graves and Heaven’s pearly gates
Oh, how we wish we might
Be free from this sin and death
And in the land of unending delight
With you, my son, with life and breath
For while my gifts for you would one day break
I can only imagine what gifts you now receive
From God, who loves to give and make
Such wonderful gifts for you, we can hardly conceive
Gifts large and small, just for you
Through Jesus, who makes all things new
Even after everything that went wrong, when you fell
We know that Jesus has made you well.
So while we can’t sing you a birthday song
We hope and pray it won’t be long
‘Till we laugh and play and sing together
And marvel at God’s love and mercy forever
Monday, October 11, 2010
Micah's Legacy, Part VI: God Owns It All
Sixth, Micah’s death has taught me that God really does own it all.
Over the past year, we have sometimes struggled with God’s power and Micah’s death. God, if you are in control of all things, then why, God, did you allow this to happen? If you are in control of all things, then we did you allow our child to die? If you could have stopped him from dying, then why didn’t you? Doesn’t that make you like a murderer, God? If you took life, when you could have saved it, doesn’t that make you a murderer? Are you a murderer, God?
When we turn to scripture we find that, unlike a murderer, who has no right to take the life of our son, God does have the right to take life. In scripture, we see that plain truth that God has the right to take Micah’s life not just because he is in control of all things, but because he owns all things. In Job 41: 11, God tells Job, “Everything under heaven belongs to me.” Even when we live like God isn’t around, or when we think we can do anything with “our” money or “our” kids, that doesn’t change the fact that God does indeed own everything.
After God took everything away from Job, Job continued to praise God. In the midst of his sorrow, Job said, “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job 1:21. Nancy Guthrie says, “Evidently Job, long before, had figured out that his extreme wealth and blessing not only came from God but also were still God’s, while Job himself was just a steward.” Nancy Guthrie, Holding on to Hope, p. 23.
Indeed, Pastor Skip Heitzig says, “We don’t own our children. They are entrusted to us from Him, but we are only stewards of them. And since God entrusted them to us, He may decide at any time, to say, “I want them now, and I’ll take care of them from now on. I’ll surround them with My special love and mercy. I’ll give to them so much more than you could ever provide. That’s His prerogative as Sovereign God.” Skip Heitzig, Jesus, Friend of Children, p. 21.
This coming saturday night, Pastor Kenny Stokes will, Lord willing, dedicate Owen to God. Here are the words of dedication:
“Owen Robert Wessman, together with your parents you love you dearly and this people who care about the outcome of your faith, I dedicate you to God, surrendering together with them all worldly claims upon your life in the hope that you will belong wholly to Jesus Christ, forever.”
It is difficult, really difficult, to surrender "all worldly claims" upon our little son's life. Our natural inclinition is to holder tighter, not looser, to Owen because he know that it is possible that God would take Owen, just as He took Micah. But through Micah’s death, I have come to understand that Owen, like Micah, is owned by God. We want control of our son's life. We want ownership of him. But God has staked a claim to him. In our better moments, when we can really take into account what is best for Owen, we wouldn't want it any other way. Our hope, in forsaking any worldly claims upon Owen's life is that Owen would belong wholly to Jesus, just as Micah is now wholly with Jesus.
Over the past year, we have sometimes struggled with God’s power and Micah’s death. God, if you are in control of all things, then why, God, did you allow this to happen? If you are in control of all things, then we did you allow our child to die? If you could have stopped him from dying, then why didn’t you? Doesn’t that make you like a murderer, God? If you took life, when you could have saved it, doesn’t that make you a murderer? Are you a murderer, God?
When we turn to scripture we find that, unlike a murderer, who has no right to take the life of our son, God does have the right to take life. In scripture, we see that plain truth that God has the right to take Micah’s life not just because he is in control of all things, but because he owns all things. In Job 41: 11, God tells Job, “Everything under heaven belongs to me.” Even when we live like God isn’t around, or when we think we can do anything with “our” money or “our” kids, that doesn’t change the fact that God does indeed own everything.
After God took everything away from Job, Job continued to praise God. In the midst of his sorrow, Job said, “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job 1:21. Nancy Guthrie says, “Evidently Job, long before, had figured out that his extreme wealth and blessing not only came from God but also were still God’s, while Job himself was just a steward.” Nancy Guthrie, Holding on to Hope, p. 23.
Indeed, Pastor Skip Heitzig says, “We don’t own our children. They are entrusted to us from Him, but we are only stewards of them. And since God entrusted them to us, He may decide at any time, to say, “I want them now, and I’ll take care of them from now on. I’ll surround them with My special love and mercy. I’ll give to them so much more than you could ever provide. That’s His prerogative as Sovereign God.” Skip Heitzig, Jesus, Friend of Children, p. 21.
This coming saturday night, Pastor Kenny Stokes will, Lord willing, dedicate Owen to God. Here are the words of dedication:
“Owen Robert Wessman, together with your parents you love you dearly and this people who care about the outcome of your faith, I dedicate you to God, surrendering together with them all worldly claims upon your life in the hope that you will belong wholly to Jesus Christ, forever.”
It is difficult, really difficult, to surrender "all worldly claims" upon our little son's life. Our natural inclinition is to holder tighter, not looser, to Owen because he know that it is possible that God would take Owen, just as He took Micah. But through Micah’s death, I have come to understand that Owen, like Micah, is owned by God. We want control of our son's life. We want ownership of him. But God has staked a claim to him. In our better moments, when we can really take into account what is best for Owen, we wouldn't want it any other way. Our hope, in forsaking any worldly claims upon Owen's life is that Owen would belong wholly to Jesus, just as Micah is now wholly with Jesus.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Marathon Fundraiser Update
Thanks to everyone for your prayers and financial contributions towards my fundraising efforts for the Micah Wessman Foundation as I ran the Twin Cities Marathon this past Sunday, October 3rd, 2010.
Here is my update:
1. Last week, I was informed that I was chosen as a "Face in the Crowd" by the organizers of the marathon. The "Face in the Crowd" program highlights the stories of 4 people participating in the marathon. Last Friday, I took part in a press conference at the St. Paul convention center in which I was able to share about Micah and our desire to help grieving parents through the Micah Wessman Foundation.
2. As part of the Faces in the Crowd program, I was interviewed for the Twin Cities Marathon television show, which will air at 7 pm this Thursday night (October 7th), on Fox Sports North. I pray that, somehow, my interview and the information shared about the Micah Wessman Foundation would be passed on to some grieving parents. I hope to post the interview to the blog, once I obtain a copy of it.
3. Between donations and additional pledges, we have been able to raise $3,534.70 to date for the foundation! We are so grateful for friends and family who have encouraged us in our ministry through their generous contributions.
4. I was able to finish the marathon in a personal best time of 3 hours, 32 minutes, 25 seconds. http://www.mtecresults.com/runner/show?rid=3879&race=177. It was a tremendous experience. The weather was ideal. I knew every part of the race course, having run all parts of the course at various times over this past spring and summer. There were approximately 11,000 people who started the marathon, and an estimated crowed of 300,000 people turned out to watch the race in Minneapolis and St. Paul. Thanks to all who prayed me through the run on Sunday morning!
Heather and I continue to be so grateful for friends, family, work colleagues, neighbors, and others we barely know who have showered us with kindness in so many ways. Thank you.
Here is my update:
1. Last week, I was informed that I was chosen as a "Face in the Crowd" by the organizers of the marathon. The "Face in the Crowd" program highlights the stories of 4 people participating in the marathon. Last Friday, I took part in a press conference at the St. Paul convention center in which I was able to share about Micah and our desire to help grieving parents through the Micah Wessman Foundation.
2. As part of the Faces in the Crowd program, I was interviewed for the Twin Cities Marathon television show, which will air at 7 pm this Thursday night (October 7th), on Fox Sports North. I pray that, somehow, my interview and the information shared about the Micah Wessman Foundation would be passed on to some grieving parents. I hope to post the interview to the blog, once I obtain a copy of it.
3. Between donations and additional pledges, we have been able to raise $3,534.70 to date for the foundation! We are so grateful for friends and family who have encouraged us in our ministry through their generous contributions.
4. I was able to finish the marathon in a personal best time of 3 hours, 32 minutes, 25 seconds. http://www.mtecresults.com/runner/show?rid=3879&race=177. It was a tremendous experience. The weather was ideal. I knew every part of the race course, having run all parts of the course at various times over this past spring and summer. There were approximately 11,000 people who started the marathon, and an estimated crowed of 300,000 people turned out to watch the race in Minneapolis and St. Paul. Thanks to all who prayed me through the run on Sunday morning!
Heather and I continue to be so grateful for friends, family, work colleagues, neighbors, and others we barely know who have showered us with kindness in so many ways. Thank you.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Micah's Legacy, Part V: To Walk in Faith with an Enigmatic God
Fifth, Micah’s death has meant that we must walk and talk with God even when we do not know what God is doing. In the 14 months since Micah has died, Heather and I have often struggled with God over Micah’s death. We have often wondered:
· Why us? Why do we have to bear this burden of grief?
· Why now? God, if you wanted to take Micah, and if I was required to bury my son, why couldn’t we have just a few more years with him?
· Why would you take Micah away, only to give us Owen so soon after? In giving us Owen, it is clear that you want us to be parents—so why did you take Micah from us?
· Why didn’t the doctors find the pea in his lung? Why didn’t they take out the pea? Why did the pea get lodged in his windpipe?
· Why couldn’t Heather or the EMTs revive him? Why didn’t I realize what was going on, and try to shake the pea lose? Why was I so powerless to watch my son die?
In the September 2010 edition of Christianity Today, Frank James III writes about his grief following the death of his younger brother, Kelly, who died in 2006 in a mountain climbing accident. About his grief, Mr. James writes, “There is disappointment, sadness, and confusion, but oddly, there is no retreat from God. Instead, I find myself drawn to God. To be sure, he is enigmatic than I thought, but I still can’t shake loose from him. There seems to be a kind of gravitational pull toward God. …My conception of faith has become Abrahamic—which is to say, I must trust God even though I do not understand him.” Christianity Today, September 2010, 61.
Mr. James is right in describing his faith as “Abrahamic.” God promised Abraham that he would become the father of the nation of Israel. But Abraham had to wait many years for God to fulfill his promise to provide him with a son. Then, in Genesis chapter 22, God tells Abraham to take his only son, Isaac, and sacrifice him as a burnt offering. Amazingly, Abraham was ready to do so, even after having endured so many years of waiting upon God for his son. Then, at just the last moment, when Abraham’s knife was raised to sacrifice Isaac, God provided a ram as a substitute sacrifice.
The story of Abraham’s near-sacrifice of Isaac seems to defy logic. If God knew the extent of Abraham’s faith, why did he test Abraham like this? Scripture says that God stopped Abraham once he saw that Abraham was ready to sacrifice his own son. Genesis 22:11-12. But isn’t God supposed to be all-knowing? So what is the point of this exercise?
Like us, Abraham had the capacity for logic; he could have questioned God’s demand that Isaac be sacrificed. Abraham could have asked, “God, if you are all-powerful and all-knowing, why did you give me Isaac, only to have me sacrifice him now? What is the point of that?” But Abraham, without questioning God or his ways, was ready to be obedient to God, even to the point of the death of his own son at his own hand. Indeed, it was by faith that Abraham trusted in God to provide for him and for his son. “By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promised was in the act of offering up his only son, of whom it was said, “Through Isaac shall your offspring be named.” He considered that God was able even to raise him from the dead, from which, figuratively speaking, he did receive him back.” Hebrews 11:17-19.
The author of Hebrews also writes that, “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. For by it the people of old received their commendation.” Hebrews 11:1-2. God was pleased with Abraham’s life because he lived an obedient life in faith, not logic. Abraham received his commendation from God precisely because he did not stop to debate God over the righteousness of his ways. Abraham is listed as a member of the "Hall of Faith" in Hebrews chapter 11 because he was obedient to God, even when, from a human perspective, he had reason to doubt God.
As Christians, we must take Abraham's example and follow God where he leads, even when we don’t know what God intends to do in and through our circumstances. We must live a life through the heart (in faith), and not just the head (by logic only). In difficult circumstances, our faith must become dearer to us than it ever has before, because in it is the “assurance of things hoped for.” For Heather and me, we have learned that we must walk with God in faith, even though we realize that we will not understand God’s reasons, on this side of Heaven, for why God deemed it necessary to take Micah home to Heaven so soon.
· Why us? Why do we have to bear this burden of grief?
· Why now? God, if you wanted to take Micah, and if I was required to bury my son, why couldn’t we have just a few more years with him?
· Why would you take Micah away, only to give us Owen so soon after? In giving us Owen, it is clear that you want us to be parents—so why did you take Micah from us?
· Why didn’t the doctors find the pea in his lung? Why didn’t they take out the pea? Why did the pea get lodged in his windpipe?
· Why couldn’t Heather or the EMTs revive him? Why didn’t I realize what was going on, and try to shake the pea lose? Why was I so powerless to watch my son die?
In the September 2010 edition of Christianity Today, Frank James III writes about his grief following the death of his younger brother, Kelly, who died in 2006 in a mountain climbing accident. About his grief, Mr. James writes, “There is disappointment, sadness, and confusion, but oddly, there is no retreat from God. Instead, I find myself drawn to God. To be sure, he is enigmatic than I thought, but I still can’t shake loose from him. There seems to be a kind of gravitational pull toward God. …My conception of faith has become Abrahamic—which is to say, I must trust God even though I do not understand him.” Christianity Today, September 2010, 61.
Mr. James is right in describing his faith as “Abrahamic.” God promised Abraham that he would become the father of the nation of Israel. But Abraham had to wait many years for God to fulfill his promise to provide him with a son. Then, in Genesis chapter 22, God tells Abraham to take his only son, Isaac, and sacrifice him as a burnt offering. Amazingly, Abraham was ready to do so, even after having endured so many years of waiting upon God for his son. Then, at just the last moment, when Abraham’s knife was raised to sacrifice Isaac, God provided a ram as a substitute sacrifice.
The story of Abraham’s near-sacrifice of Isaac seems to defy logic. If God knew the extent of Abraham’s faith, why did he test Abraham like this? Scripture says that God stopped Abraham once he saw that Abraham was ready to sacrifice his own son. Genesis 22:11-12. But isn’t God supposed to be all-knowing? So what is the point of this exercise?
Like us, Abraham had the capacity for logic; he could have questioned God’s demand that Isaac be sacrificed. Abraham could have asked, “God, if you are all-powerful and all-knowing, why did you give me Isaac, only to have me sacrifice him now? What is the point of that?” But Abraham, without questioning God or his ways, was ready to be obedient to God, even to the point of the death of his own son at his own hand. Indeed, it was by faith that Abraham trusted in God to provide for him and for his son. “By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promised was in the act of offering up his only son, of whom it was said, “Through Isaac shall your offspring be named.” He considered that God was able even to raise him from the dead, from which, figuratively speaking, he did receive him back.” Hebrews 11:17-19.
The author of Hebrews also writes that, “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. For by it the people of old received their commendation.” Hebrews 11:1-2. God was pleased with Abraham’s life because he lived an obedient life in faith, not logic. Abraham received his commendation from God precisely because he did not stop to debate God over the righteousness of his ways. Abraham is listed as a member of the "Hall of Faith" in Hebrews chapter 11 because he was obedient to God, even when, from a human perspective, he had reason to doubt God.
As Christians, we must take Abraham's example and follow God where he leads, even when we don’t know what God intends to do in and through our circumstances. We must live a life through the heart (in faith), and not just the head (by logic only). In difficult circumstances, our faith must become dearer to us than it ever has before, because in it is the “assurance of things hoped for.” For Heather and me, we have learned that we must walk with God in faith, even though we realize that we will not understand God’s reasons, on this side of Heaven, for why God deemed it necessary to take Micah home to Heaven so soon.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Micah's Legacy, Part IV: An Increased Reliance Upon God
Fourth, Micah’s death has decreased our reliance on ourselves, and increased our reliance upon God. Before Micah died, I would have been able to explain to you what it means to trust in God. But ever since that Sunday morning in July of last year, when Heather and I stood by, helplessly watching as our son left this earth, we have a newfound appreciation for our own limitations. Understanding our own limitations is helpful insofar as it requires us to place a greater degree of trust in God.
The circumstances surrounding Micah’s death clearly demonstrates the surpassing power of God’s purposes over even our best-laid plans. Regardless of how much we plan, how many professionals are involved in our plan, how wise we think the plan is, or even how much we pray to God, our wisdom and strength are utterly insufficient. Whether in our professional lives, our parenting abilities, or our financial situations, we are utterly helpless without God. While God will use our abilities and circumstances to carry out His plans, God’s purposes (not ours) will stand.
The implications to me of my own lack of self-sufficiency are far-reaching. One very practical application to my life of this has been in financial provision. While we can (and should) be diligent about education, training, and building a career, it is God who ultimately provides us with the skills, the job, and the paycheck. In the twelfth chapter of Luke, I find two passages, found consecutive to one another, to be relevant to living a life of financial reliance upon God.
First, in Luke 12: 13-21 Jesus gives a parable which has often been called the parable of the “Rich Fool.” “Someone in the crowed said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me. But he said to him, “Man, who made me a judge or arbitrator over you?” And he said them, “Take care, and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” And he told them a parable, saying, “The land of a rich man produced plentifully, and he thought to himself, “What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops? And he said, “I will do this: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.” But God said to him, “Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be? So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God.”
As an estate planning attorney, I have the opportunity to observe in many of my clients the very same mentality espoused by this rich farmer. It certainly seems wise to make money, to save, and to plan for educational and retirement costs. I don’t think that Jesus was faulting the farmer for owning productive farmland or making money; he was, however, faulting the farmer for his intention to rely upon himself and to “cut out” God from his financial life. The rich farmer attempted to rely upon his “own” finances to be rich toward towards himself, but not rich towards God.
The rich farmer was also making presuming upon a certain future with regard to his money. He thought, incorrectly, that he would have many years to “relax, eat, drink and be merry.” So many of us in our comfortable American culture think that, based upon our income, savings and retirement accounts, we will have 15 or 20 years of a “rich” retirement to relax, eat, drink and be merry. But God’s plans are not our plans. With the onset of cancer, heart attack, or life-altering accident, God’s plans are often not our plans.
In our situation, soon after Micah’s birth, one of our family members was kind enough to make a generous contribution to a college savings account in Micah’s name. All of us, myself included, presumed upon a future in which Micah would have the opportunity to college. No one ever dreamed that Micah wouldn’t have a chance to go to college. Jesus is not suggesting that we shouldn’t save for future expenses, such as retirement and college; he is, however, warning us against relying upon ourselves for a certain future.
Second, in Luke 12:22-31, it seems that Jesus anticipates (or perhaps answers) the listener’s objection from his first parable. I can imagine one of his listeners saying, “Jesus, I don’t understand that parable. If we can’t even store up crops during a good year, what are we supposed to do about money? Shouldn’t I worry about having enough money to feed myself and my family?
Jesus says, “…I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor born, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds! And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest? Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried. For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. Instead, seek his kingdom, and all these things will be added to you.”
The promise that “God will clothe you” must have had significant meaning to the listeners, given that, earlier in the Gospel of Luke, we are told that Jesus demonstrated his authority by feeding the 5,000 with five loaves and two fishes. Earlier Jesus showed his listeners that He has the authority to feed and clothe them; now, he is commanding them to trust in Him for our daily provisions. Jesus is not giving us a list of commands, and then suggesting that we are “on our own.” God calls us to an unwavering obedience to him, and in his sovereignty, promises to provide all we need.
Jesus is not looking for people to stand “on their own two feet.” Jesus is looking for people on their knees, people who are in such need of God’s power in their lives that they are willing to rely on God for everything, including food and clothing. If we rely upon ourselves, we will be anxious about every life opportunity. We will have our attention divided between Jesus and the status of our own pocketbook.
In taking Micah away from me, the Lord also took away some of my tendencies towards self-sufficiency. Whether in our financial situation, specifically, or just in life, generally, we have lost a sense of self-sufficiency, and increasingly found a need to rely upon God.
The circumstances surrounding Micah’s death clearly demonstrates the surpassing power of God’s purposes over even our best-laid plans. Regardless of how much we plan, how many professionals are involved in our plan, how wise we think the plan is, or even how much we pray to God, our wisdom and strength are utterly insufficient. Whether in our professional lives, our parenting abilities, or our financial situations, we are utterly helpless without God. While God will use our abilities and circumstances to carry out His plans, God’s purposes (not ours) will stand.
The implications to me of my own lack of self-sufficiency are far-reaching. One very practical application to my life of this has been in financial provision. While we can (and should) be diligent about education, training, and building a career, it is God who ultimately provides us with the skills, the job, and the paycheck. In the twelfth chapter of Luke, I find two passages, found consecutive to one another, to be relevant to living a life of financial reliance upon God.
First, in Luke 12: 13-21 Jesus gives a parable which has often been called the parable of the “Rich Fool.” “Someone in the crowed said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me. But he said to him, “Man, who made me a judge or arbitrator over you?” And he said them, “Take care, and be on your guard against all covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” And he told them a parable, saying, “The land of a rich man produced plentifully, and he thought to himself, “What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops? And he said, “I will do this: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.” But God said to him, “Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be? So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God.”
As an estate planning attorney, I have the opportunity to observe in many of my clients the very same mentality espoused by this rich farmer. It certainly seems wise to make money, to save, and to plan for educational and retirement costs. I don’t think that Jesus was faulting the farmer for owning productive farmland or making money; he was, however, faulting the farmer for his intention to rely upon himself and to “cut out” God from his financial life. The rich farmer attempted to rely upon his “own” finances to be rich toward towards himself, but not rich towards God.
The rich farmer was also making presuming upon a certain future with regard to his money. He thought, incorrectly, that he would have many years to “relax, eat, drink and be merry.” So many of us in our comfortable American culture think that, based upon our income, savings and retirement accounts, we will have 15 or 20 years of a “rich” retirement to relax, eat, drink and be merry. But God’s plans are not our plans. With the onset of cancer, heart attack, or life-altering accident, God’s plans are often not our plans.
In our situation, soon after Micah’s birth, one of our family members was kind enough to make a generous contribution to a college savings account in Micah’s name. All of us, myself included, presumed upon a future in which Micah would have the opportunity to college. No one ever dreamed that Micah wouldn’t have a chance to go to college. Jesus is not suggesting that we shouldn’t save for future expenses, such as retirement and college; he is, however, warning us against relying upon ourselves for a certain future.
Second, in Luke 12:22-31, it seems that Jesus anticipates (or perhaps answers) the listener’s objection from his first parable. I can imagine one of his listeners saying, “Jesus, I don’t understand that parable. If we can’t even store up crops during a good year, what are we supposed to do about money? Shouldn’t I worry about having enough money to feed myself and my family?
Jesus says, “…I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor born, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds! And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest? Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried. For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. Instead, seek his kingdom, and all these things will be added to you.”
The promise that “God will clothe you” must have had significant meaning to the listeners, given that, earlier in the Gospel of Luke, we are told that Jesus demonstrated his authority by feeding the 5,000 with five loaves and two fishes. Earlier Jesus showed his listeners that He has the authority to feed and clothe them; now, he is commanding them to trust in Him for our daily provisions. Jesus is not giving us a list of commands, and then suggesting that we are “on our own.” God calls us to an unwavering obedience to him, and in his sovereignty, promises to provide all we need.
Jesus is not looking for people to stand “on their own two feet.” Jesus is looking for people on their knees, people who are in such need of God’s power in their lives that they are willing to rely on God for everything, including food and clothing. If we rely upon ourselves, we will be anxious about every life opportunity. We will have our attention divided between Jesus and the status of our own pocketbook.
In taking Micah away from me, the Lord also took away some of my tendencies towards self-sufficiency. Whether in our financial situation, specifically, or just in life, generally, we have lost a sense of self-sufficiency, and increasingly found a need to rely upon God.
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